When I was in my early years of grade school- my mom went to parent teacher conference and the teacher reported being very "pleased" with my hard work and behavior in school.
After a long pause she continued on with, "However, I am concerned with her stomach." Basically stating that at moments I seemed anxious or nervous...
...and she was right.
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| {The perfectionist at age 5 and practicing staying in the lines} |
My stomach often was in knots or had dancing butterflies whirling inside.
I was nervous.
I put a lot of pressure on myself to please my teacher and my parents... and well myself really. It hung over my head each and every day as I tried to do my work "perfectly." My mom recalls moments when I would be practicing my handwriting and would not get a certain letter to be just the way I wanted- I would end up erasing holes into my paper and then crumple it up and start over...and over...and over again.
I took school really seriously (a little to seriously- why didn't anyone tell me elementary grades didn't really count towards anything!) and therefore, I was slightly obsessive about it.
Maybe a touch of OCD?
I was that kid that never had to be reminded to do my homework. I just did it. The consequence of not having it turned in was enough to make me never forget an assignment...EVER.
I was a mother's dream.
Luckily, that perfectionist little girl- the girl who felt like she had to do everything perfectly- is just a distant memory.
Today, I am much more free. I am okay to not have everything go as planned. I am okay with leaving a mess...a little too good at that one- I think. I am okay about coloring outside of the lines or making a mistake. And I am okay about not being perfect and pleasing everyone.
It was through expressive art journaling- that I have found how to let go of controlling an outcome and just roll with what is.
It is what it is- is now my motto or in the words of p90x's Tony- Do your best forget the rest.
I will be introducing you my monthly challenge tomorrow...it involves making a mess...
But when does a little healthy does of anxiety in children become a problem?
What do you think?
If you think your child may have anxiety about school or anxiety in general read more signs here.
besitos,
xo
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