Praying for Patience.

Awwww back to reality. 

sigh.

We have escaped the responisbilities of real life pretty much for the past four weeks. From the sparkling snowy woods of McCall, Idaho to the tropical paradise with my family in the Dominican Republic. 

It has been heavenly.

Any established routine or schedule has been thrown out the window... along with a decent bedtime and healthy eating habits. Also Heavenly.

 And let me tell you... We are paying for it. BIG time.

This past week has been adjustment week at our house... and it has been tough. Not to mention we had the attack of the killer pink eye in our home along with snow storms, teething, and car troubles to make matters worse... Fatigue, impatience, and just plain grumpiness has plagued my home. Could it be post holiday blues? Does anyone else feel this way? 

And as a result? A very emotional/whiny and hyper active three-year-old (and mommy).

 We have had a few rough moments to say the least. I was beginning to wonder where that sweet three almost four year old disappeared to.  So much so that I got down on my knees and pleaded for the Lord to bless me with patience, love and a way to help my Little Man. At that moment, Little Man just happened to walk into the room were I was kneeling and asked what I was doing. Tears streamed down my face and I told him- "Praying for more patience and asking Heavenly Father to guide me in knowing how I can help you." Just then, he leaped into my arms knocking me over on my back. We embraced each other and both sobbed. Our relationship and trust was beginning to rebuild after the difficult confrontations we had  that week. 

Later as I was putting him to bed he asked to play pretend with his "doggies." I agreed  and he guided me through his play. I watched as he said a prayer for his doggies that he could protect and love them as their Father. Through that tender moment I understood what he needed from me...To protect and to love him...most importantly to have patience.

Here is to the beginning of a new week!
besitos, xo

Do we set our kids up to misbehave?

As parents do we set our kids up to misbehave?

 I would say the answer to that often times is... YES! 

It's like me asking this 18-month-old to pose and smile at the camera and be still. 

Seriously- 18 month-olds are not wired to be still. End of story.

 In fact, that is the busiest time of their life. How could I expect that from him? I literally could not even keep him in my arms for more than a few seconds to get this blurry photo!

But even with any other age- parents overlook what is really going on through the eyes of their child. We want a quick fix and solution to the problem...and fast. We have forgotten what being a child is like and really their emotional needs are really similar to ours.

Two things to remember...

Kids want to feel connected and belonging. (just like us)

and 

Kids need to feel like they have some sense of power and control in their life. (just like us)

If we are constantly choosing, demanding, saying "Don't do that...Get off of there...Eat this..." we just might find a little fighter who feels misunderstood, discouraged, and powerless wanting to demand some attention and control in their life.

How would you behave if that was what you are experiencing?

Two things you can do...

Spend daily one-on-one time with your child being 100% present- no phones, no tv, no distractions. Place all your focus on them. (It's harder than you think)

and

Give them plenty of choices for them to choose from on a daily basis. 

*Also keep in mind HALT- I talked about it in this post HERE. Some reasons children misbehave to keep in mind...Hunger, Anger, Loneliness, and Tiredness.

I know I act out with any of these...and so do they.

Next time your child is not doing what you want them to do... take a moment and think of the last time you had one-on-one with them or that you gave them he opportunity to feel in charge.

I have so much more to say about this...but let's leave it at that for now.

besitos, xo

One week later...

Remember that tree I showed you in this post?

Well, when Little Man and I went back ONE WEEK LATER...this is what we saw.

I mean seriously...how could 7 days make such a drastic change?

WOW how grateful I am for taking the time to spend that afternoon being still and taking the time to notice all around me. 

I mean who would have thought just ONE WEEK LATER the yellow leaves would have been gone?

Speaking of time, can you believe this month is almost over? How did this month's challenge go? 

Was it difficult? 

How did taking a few minutes each day to be still change the rest of the day or your perspective?

CONFESSION:

I admit there were easier days than others. Some day I could only acknowledge the need to be present and would quickly turn my alarm off as if it never happened. Some days I would close my eyes and take the full two minutes if not more to be still... sometimes almost falling asleep. ;)

It is amazing how resistant we are as human beings. At times, I would find myself in the middle of a hurry and the soothing sounds of the bells on my phone would go off and I would roll my eyes and think, "Great- last thing I need right now is to take the time to spend two minutes and just be still!"

BUT

If you didn't dare do the challenge or found it impossible to do it everyday...don't beat yourself up. The monthly challenges are not for 100% changes... they are about celebrating the percentages. If you were only able to do it 2% of the time... Props to you!!  That is change.

If you don't know what the heck I am talking about and/or haven't tried the challenge this month...STOP RIGHT there and take 30 seconds and just close your eyes and breathe.

There. You did it.

Oh it's 3:03pm...my alarm is going off...Little Man is asleep still and I think I just may close my eyes and zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.

Besitos, 

xo

I'm a Cloth Diaper Addict

My 4 reasons for choosing cloth

#1 SAVES THE PLANET: Did you know that 5 million tons of untreated waste and a total of 2 billion tons of urine feces, plastic and paper are added to landfills each year? It takes around 80,000 pounds of plastic and 200,000 trees a year to manufacture the disposable diapers just for US babies alone! Not to mention that it takes up to 500 years for most diapers to decompose! That’s a lot of poop and plastic! Also, did you know that the fine print on disposable diapers tells you to “Shake baby soil into the toilet.” I mean REALLY…how many of you actually do that? I know I didn’t.

#2 SAVES MONEY:  Did you know that on average a person changes 6,000 diapers from birth to potty training?  It’s no wonder that diapers are a 7 billion dollar industry costing parents at least $2,500 on diapers and wipes on one child. If financial savings is your reason and you are aren’t afraid of a little extra step when diapering- you can cloth diaper for $200! That is a saving of $2,300! The best part is that once you have all the supplies- no need to buy more for the next child! You already have it! Here for a diaper calculator from diaperpin.com

#3 BETTER FOR MY BABY: Did you know that there are concerns that disposable diapers contain is dyes, Sodium Polyacrylate (the gel), and Dioxin ( by-product of bleaching paper)? It is also noted that cloth diapers cause less diaper rashes due to their materials that actually wicks away the moisture from your baby’s bum.

#4 THEY ARE SO CUTE:  I mean really- how could you argue with me on this one. They are just so cute on little bums and the bright colors and patterns make diaper changing more fun for me. After all, I have 6,000 of them to change right? Might as well make it more fun!

So, if you are thinking about the possibility of making the switch- stay tuned because I will be talking more about it this week. Stay tuned for more on how to get started tomorrow on How Does She!

Also, here are some links I found about saving cash with cloth diapers...take a looksie.


Diaper Decision 

Babyworks

Mint

Diaper pin

The New Parent's Guide

The Real Diaper Association

Thirsties site

Coming up next...the Givaway...

besitos,
xo

Candy Corn Feet

My sweet neighbor watched Little Man yesterday evening while I was teaching a parenting class. When I came home I found this. 

Is this not genius? 

And super easy and cute.

Just paint their little toes with yellow, orange, and white...

and stamp their feet...so cute!

Great sensory activity for kids as well!

Now,  I just want to munch on those feetsies! 

I love October.

Besitos

Gratitude.

My little man has been sick and I have been up with him a few nights in a row.  

 But honestly, I secretly love it. 

Well, not that he sick- I hate that part- but I love that I get a little extra time to just wrap my arms around his little body and kiss his warm squishy cheeks as he sleeps in my arms.

Is it normal to just want to hug and kiss your child all the time? I mean all the time- I feel like I could seriously cuddle with him all day and not get sick of it.

Is he going to have issues as a grown man because his mother was always smothering him with kisses and cuddles.

When does that stop?

 I just love that kid.

One day he will be all grown up and I won't be able to cradle him in my arms anymore on his sick nights. Well, maybe I could- but most likely it would just be plain awkward- mostly for his wife.

Anyhow- that is what is on my mind and my heart this morning. I woke up (WAY too early) from a night of restless sleep but with a full heart. A heart full of gratitude for these two boys in my life.

I love them.

That's all.

{Throwing rocks with daddy-" boy stuff" }

besitos, xo

Channeling Lucille Ball...

I'll be over at How Does She right here talking about my:

It's where I use Reflection Boards or Soul Collages to process how I feel.

Here is more on one I did over the weekend.

I started with an initial large kitchen timer image. It looks like the one I have in my kitchen that helps me manage my time (more on that later) and I started by gluing it on the page. 

To me this timer represents lack of time and the desire to either stop time completely or find a way to get more of it.

I haven't figured out how to do that quite yet. ;)

I then added books in the corner and it reminded me of how I feel so much like a student still in my field and as a mom. You think you are going to get out of graduate school just knowing everything there is to know about the human psyche but life experiences continue to be my teacher. I feel like I learn new things each and every day from being a mom and a counselor.

Then, I added my girl Lucille Ball (or at least a look a like) and was drawn to her because of who she embodied as her character on "I Love Lucy"- I mean how can you not love her? Plus, I love that era and sometimes feel like I should have lived in the 1950s! I came across an article about Lucille and did you know that she didn't have her baby until one month before her fortieth birthday after several miscarriages? I knew she was my girl- there is always hope.

Then of course amongst her fabulous outfit I had to include her wearing a large "Mom bag" with  little toy robot sticking out of it. It represents to me the reality that motherhood brings but also the possibility of feeling feminine still and being able to laugh and have fun especially at those "Mom moments" like sporting around a ridiculous huge "Mom bag." You know what I am talking about.

I continued to add images and words until it felt complete. 

As I ponder on what I created in my reflection period- here are a few that come to my mind on what they could represent.

Anyhow- you will be seeing a lot more of this as I am beginning to get ready to launch my new website. Stay tuned.

Besitos, 

xo

Date night to disaster poopy night.

Thank you for all the responses and ideas on my potty training dilemma- I am compiling a list of comments and will put together a post real soon.

I do have to tell you about what has brought us to this point...

It started two weeks ago...date night. I had been looking forward to a little fancy dinner before we attended the Fusion Awards where Proof was nominated for two awards.

Me: in my grandmother's vintage lace dress and tall leopard print stilettos. 

The Mister: looking good in his suit and tie. 

Little Man: in his superman shirt and a cute little bare bum. 

He  just had gone poop in the toilet spontaneously and we had just celebrated by dancing and eating lolly pops. But just one problem... I didn't put his underwear back on. I really don't know why- I figured that he just pooped on the potty- no way he would poop again right away- let the kid be free for a moment.

And then...

 Just as we were about to run out the door- He came upstairs to show me the poop trail leading from his legs to the floor....to MY RUG!! 

This can't be happening...there I was in my dress... in my heals... cleaning up a pile of  POOP. 

30 minutes later

We finally made it to the door where I had left the garbage bag full of the clean up mess...

but it wasn't here...it was scattered all over the floor...on another rug was the pile of poop I just had cleaned up...
ANOTHER rug!

Our lovely dog Guapo decided to rummage through it...

 I sent everyone to the car (except Guapo, he was sent outside) and I once again got down on my hands and knees in my black vintage lace dress and stilettos and cleaned up once again another mess.

Ugh.

Needless to say, we missed our fancy dinner and ran into Costa Vida all dressed up for a salad on the go.

Not what I had in mind.

It was then when I decided to give up the potty battle. 

Totally not worth it.

This night just may top the Poop facial episode we had last year. 

xo

Potty training or Parent training? PLEASE HELP!

18 months and on the potty

Potty training?
 Easy breezy.
Start early... like 18 months.
 Put them on one out of three strategically placed potties every hour and read countless potty books and watch potty training movies on youtube. My personal favorite is Elmo's Potty song ( here ) where for one moment I couldn't tell if Elmo's dad got confused and started singing a strip teese song- but that is besides the point...
This is serious stuff.

Then, make a "mickey mouse" potty treat/prize jar that he gets to decorate himself. Pink starbursts seem to be the biggest motivator around here.



Then, once he gets the potty thing and the big boy undewear down switch to a sticker chart like this one {here.} He can then earn individually wrapped dollar stor prizes for filling up a row...or save them  for the poops on the potty...that seems to be a toughest thing to master over here.


But WAIT...what if after ALL YOUR efforts your kid is still indifferent about going on the potty on his own?
He knows how to stay dry in his underwear all day but finds it easier to just pee (and poop...good story about this coming up) wherever whenever.  He also could stay in a wet poopy diaper for days without complaints if you let him.

 So HELP!!!

My behavioral and psych 101 techniques don't seem to be working! I thought that by gradually starting early and using positive reinforcement that potty training would be a breeze. I envisioned him sprinting to the toilet at the first sign he had to go- and we would high five each other and dance around because we were so proud and excited! That's not happening.

Now I REALLY WANT HIM TO do it more than he does.

All you mommies out there...what is your advice?
Little man is two and a half...should I back off and let him do his thing or continue with the potty training...or parent training more like?

Please help...tips, advice- anything- what have you done? What should I do??

besitos,
xo

My love for my BabbaBox and GIVEAWAY CLOSED

It came. 

The package I have been waiting for.

The BababaBox from BabbaCo.  

I must tell you how excited I was- it was like Christmas!

 I carefully opened the box lid...

Peeled back the cute little sticker...

To find that the theme this month was: "The Way I Feel."

My favorite topic!

...And there it was a magical box full of activities, creative crafts, exploration games, and a book all revolving around feelings!

I mean there was EVERYTHING...

...from a little tiny glue bottle to a pair of scissors! I never had to get up once to find something I needed. 

It was ALL THERE!

In one of the "Explore" sections we found the coolest "Feeling Finder" shades. 

 You and your child can put them on and explore and identify how other's are feeling. As a mental health counselor working with children- I can't tell you enough the importance of teaching our kiddos to learn how to "read" the facial expressions of others. It activates the part of the brain that increases emotional intelligence and increases their empathy and self identifying their own emotions. 

There was also a "Feeling Journal" where your child can track the feelings they find that day. Like if they see mommy laughing- they get to put a happy face in their journal. But watch out-if mommy is grumpy- (they go hide in the closet) then they put the mad face on.

Genius. 

Then, we made sock puppets and acted out many different feelings. 

 

Playing sock puppets with one hand while trying to take photos in the other- nearly impossible. But believe me- those sock puppets Henry and Wilma followed us everywhere throughout the day. 

Love it.

And as if BabbaCo didn't think of everything already...they included a little gift for me. 

Awwwww... I heart them.

And wanna know the best part?? 

You can get one.

BabbaCo is giving one lucky WeedstoWishes reader a FREE BabbaBox!!

*Offer ends Monday July 30th*

Lots of quick options to enter below:

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Good luck! and Enjoy!

besitos,
xo

Less load yet less time. {Letter #5 to myself}

Dear 30 year old crazy woman-

Why does it seem like the more you take OFF your plate to so called "simply" your life- the more you put on it? I appreciate the fact you acknowledge you have a problem with taking on too much... You are the first to admit it... BUT WHY IN THE WORLD DON'T YOU CHANGE? 

 What happened to June being your birthday month of play and rest? Well my friend, June came and went... and instead of it being relaxing and peaceful...it ended up being the busiest month you had this year! That is until July came around... so- SLOW DOWN!

I appreciate your efforts in taking a proactive approach by closing your private practice, turning down potential photography clients, taking the summer off from work,  and even delegating some time consuming tasks to others willing to take them on. Thumbs up. But don't you know that being proactive in reducing your load also means saying "NO" to opportunities that come your way? Practice with me saying, "I am sorry, I can't seem to fit that in my schedule." Not so bad right? I know I know- you love what you do and want to do those things...

but if your summer goals were to practice being more "domestic" and engage in things such as baking fresh bread, planting that butterfly garden, or learning how to sew pillows for your couch... then...where is the bread?

Don't even let me get started on your email accounts. How does a person have accrue 11,662 no wait- notification on my phone went off- make that 11,663-  unread emails across four different emails? And how does a person have twice that many photos to edit or be categorized just sitting in your computer? You got me.

Will the day come when you are caught up and can just sit and enjoy the now? 

Is it possible to ever get caught up?

This is your year.
It's time

You can do it.

xo, 

Wherever they are is home. (letter #4)

Dear 30 year old self- (letter #4)

I have been away for a few days from these two. Despite how much FUN I had with my sister's and my mom- I couldn't wait to get home. It seemed like such a long flight back home as I longed to be in Mister's arms again and kiss those soft cheeks of my Little Man. 

They are my home. 

Nothing is better than being right there nestled up to them both. 

Last night I couldn't resist...I let Little Man sleep in our bed. I slept right in the middle... well knowing that I was going to have the most terrible night of sleep (which I did) with Little Man tossing and turning- I didn't care. 

I stayed awake and took in the moment giving thanks for having them in my life. 

The morning came too quickly. It was time to get out of bed and part ways once again.

One thing I have learned is that it doesn't matter where I am... my home is wherever these two guys are.

I love my boys.


Sincerely, One lucky (30 year-old) gal.

besitos, xo

Homemaking is not my strength: Letter #1

Letter #1 Homemaking is not my strength.

Dear 30 year old self-

I have a confession... homemaking is not my strength.  The dishes pile up in my sink, I forget to make my bed, and I absolutely HATE putting away laundry.  In fact, it takes every ounce of energy to remember to do these things. I would much rather play with Little man. read something interesting, get messy in my art journal, blog, be outside, create something, paint, and pretty much anything else there is to do besides spend the afternoon cleaning floors and folding laundry.

I didn't grow up in what some may think of as a "typical Mormon" home where the house was spotless and there was a plate of cookies and fresh baked bread waiting right as you walked through the door from school. (exaggerated I know- but that is how I envisioned other families to be like)

My mom grew up in a culture where there was hired help to cook, clean, drive, run errands, and garden. I often fantasize what that may be like... but at 30 years old- snap out of it...my entourage of hired help are not knocking at my door anytime soon.

It's time to find the JOY IN HOMEMAKING. 

So to be totally serious about this qwest... I am taking the summer off from work and am on a mission to see if there is really indeed joy in homemaking and hopefully find that balance in my life I have been looking for! 

Wish me luck!

Sincerly, 

The deprived homemaker in you

Side note: 

This letter comes from an "ah ha" moment I recently had when I attended Womens' Conference at BYU a few months ago. It is a conference for women with several different topics. I had only signed up for one day due to a conflict of wanting to attend a play therapy conference instead. 

However, the Lord had other plans for me.  

 It was the final speaker of the day and I had this impression that I should get up and buy my ticket for the next day. "But why?" I thought- I am not planning on attending. And then the same thought came to me again...so, I immediately got up crawling over people and chairs to make my way to the exit.  Needless to say, I bought my ticket for the next day. Then, I told God- "Okay if there is something I need to hear please help me choose and find my way to those classes." 

 Let me just say- I needed to be there. 

It was then that I made the decision to take another thing off my plate and take care of my home.

Besitos, xo